Being pregnant I forget so much stuff that I know I had tons to talk about and now I can't remember what it was. However, Trent and I celebrated our 10th anniversary this year. We figured we will go somewhere cool for our 12th anniversary when I am done nursing the baby. We found an awesome mattress on KSL for cheap and it was basically brand new. We have had our bed for ten years and our bodies from sleeping HURT! It's amazing what a new mattress will do to a good nights sleep! I think we went to Chilli's another day. I love their baked potatoes soup!! So in ten years through the thick and thin we are who we are today, would I trade the rough patches? I would love to say yes, but in reality it's the trials we go through that makes us stronger and I am more in love with Trent now than the day I married him. Here is our history of numbers:
9 new nieces and nephews
5 moves
4 jobs
3.5 kids
2 dogs
2 siblings weddings
many years of school
1 parent gone
Many laughs & tears, sometimes both at once, I can't believe it's been ten years, but at the same time it feels like I have known him all my life. He is always there to support me and build me up. I hope we have many many years together on this earth and for eternity in the next!

Sophie

After Charlie died, we wanted to get another one. We knew Charlie couldn't be replaced but we thought it would help having something to cuddle with. We found Sophie. She is so small she can't jump on the bed or the couch. The dominate owner must have been a woman because she always comes to me and wants to sleep by my feet. She puts her little paws up like they are hands and rubs her head and tries to get your attention. She loves to lick and is very calm. She comes from a place where there were other dogs as well, now we just have to watch the darn door so she doesn't escape into the road!

All Dogs go to Heaven

We got our dog Charlie a year and a half ago. This was my first pet ever. I swear the dog had A.D.D but he still worked his way into our hearts. This dog would jump so high when you would put a stuffed animal in the air, he loved to cuddle and would let me play with his paws. This dog would bark at everyone walking by and it drove me crazy, because really he was just a big scared cat. He was scared of balloons and would run out of the room if he saw one. He was scared of his doggie door too. The problem was, he wasn't scared of moving cars. One day he was barking at a huge bus and was running under the tires I thought for sure he was a goner. On Monday March 19th I woke up and was going to put him in the front yard because I didn't want mud in my house and it had rained and the backyard was muddy. But I let him out anyways. Hannah was home because she had her tonsils out and we were watching a movie when a neighbor knocked on the door. I thought for some reason he was saying that someone had died, I kept thinking oh great who now?! But when trent came in I said " What??" He said "Charlie's Dead" That was weird to process. He got out of the backyard and ran right into the car. I don't know if it was pregnancy hormones, me trying to cope with my mother in laws death , or because it was the first pet.. maybe all three but I cried for like three days!! :) I was worse than the kids! I will miss his deviant little ways of standing on the table, trying to beg for food but than was so picky he wouldn't eat it. I would be downstairs and he would try to come down but when he saw me and I would say "CHARLIE" He ran up the stairs! We told the kids that Nana must have wanted a little dog in heaven to play with. He looked like a wet rat when we would get him out of the tub.

Week 12- Still liking salsa and chips, and pickles
Week 13- feeling physically better and off the meds for sickness. Starting to be down and missing my MIL
Week 14- Dr appt. Heard heartbeat, needing a new food, done with salsa and cottage cheese. Don't like lil cesears anymore, can't drink carbonation anymore either
Week 15- starting to feel my uterus, but still can hide the fact that I am pregnant.
Week 16-hannah had her tonsils out this week, time is flying by. It's a Girl!! so shocked!
Week 17- Kidney infection! :(
Week 18 - Felt the baby move and hiccup on March 31st or my birthday, don't remember now. Felt her again and so did trent and faith today April 4th. she had the hiccups again
Week 19- recieved some sad and confusing news about a neural tube defect, can't sleep.Problem with pharamacyoverdose that may have caused it & my lathergicness. Crossing fingers they are wrong. feel kicking.

I always felt there might be another baby. However, I was ok with having the three I had, it was easier, cheaper, and I didn't have to go through another pregnancy. In October I felt strong there was another baby. The thoughts came to me " Abraham was called to sacrifice his (son) child, you are called to sacrifice for one. " I knew there was a boy waiting to come to our family. (Yet at the same time now that I am writing this I feel strong there is a girl too... yikes. jk So who knows what the gender is I don't think I can convince the hubby to do this one more time after this, nor can I even want to imagine the sickness with another) I remember talking to my husband who was adamantly against having another one. Pregnancy is a hard time in my household... mommy & wife are gone for a while. It was October 14th 2011 Trent and I went to Texas Road House and were talking about another one. That is when I checked my phone after we were done eating and found out my mother in law was dying. After her death I knew that she lived her life around her family and I too wanted that. I took a test in dec, not sure why but it said positive... or so it sure looked it. Trent said he would believe me after I took three... well those came back negative. I was so surprised. Later he said that he thinks I took it for him. He was ready to say we are done, but got this feeling that maybe one try and that is it. lol Well I got a blood test and it was also negative..... fast forward two weeks later I found out I was 4 weeks pregnant on Christmas.
Week 5- Tired, we went to Bill's house and I would fall asleep sitting up in the chair upstairs. Chinese food (Which I used to HATE) is my cravings, also is cottage cheese with cucumbers
Week 6 - First dr appt, saw the little pea and it was beating on ultrasound, I am sick
Week 7- Sick, was put on Reglan and that seemed to knock the edge off.. Not as sick as I was with Faith... still think it's a boy, but have a girls name picked out lol I get sick around 5 at night, my mouth starts to feel like it is frozen in place.
Week 8- Put on compazine as well. Another ultrasound (dr wants to make sure I am feeling well. I really like her) Cottage Cheese is my food of choice, it smooths my stomach. Uncle Joel told me to go eat some pickles, the way he was talking about it made me crave one at Kelli's. I ended up eating four. Yogurt helps too. I eat every two hours and eating cereal in the morning helps a lot
Week 9- Lost weight, still sick but can't complain .. time is flying by and nothing like faith's pregnancy. Get metallic taste in my mouth that is pretty gross.
Week 10- Sick, contractions and back pain, Dr visit with an Infection. now on macrobid for remainder of pregnancy. Had an ultrasound and saw the baby bouncing.
Week 11- Starting to feel better! Until the end of the week and tired and little sick again, hope there are brighter days ahead! Eat whatever I am craving that we have in the house, however I am craving a peach right now and we don't have any of those.
Sunday I will be at week 12 which is huge step for me. This first trimester has been a blessing in flying by! I have to get up every hour to empty my bladder it feels like, but hopefully soon that will go away and I will get to feel this baby move. My fear of miscarriage is starting to blot out, alot of that is thanks to trent's faith and his blessings. It still feels unreal to me, but I am starting to allow myself to get excited. I am worried about pushing the kids out of their spots when the baby is born. I hope to find out what the baby is on March 23rd.

Before I got pregnant I started a blog called "Sugar Go Down." It is still on private except for a few who were following what I was doing. I started kick boxing and eating small meals daily. I have lost ten pounds and had to stop but since I have been pregnant, I have maintained it. Kinda crazy that it is easier it seems to lose weight while first pregnant than when I'm not.....

Yes I am pregnant, and I am so thankful that yesterday my morning sickness didn't hit me too bad! I hope this is the early start of the future! I have been so blessed it is nothing like Faith's, but I normally get sick around five at night. Yesterday I didn't go to bed till around ten and then I was wide awake! Hope the goodness is keeping it real. I see my dr again this friday. She wanted to see me back in two weeks. I have never had such close appt's before this early in pregnancy but I am excited to get another ultrasound. This is how we announced the pregnancy. Kelli and my father in law Bill, and sis in law SHeryl were the only three who got it right away!

you ever heard the quote " life happens when you make other plans?" That has been my life, and you know what? I wouldn't change a thing.
First started when I went to Dixie, my plans :
Go to school & get teaching degree. Go on a mission.
Reality:
Went to school. Got married to a man who became my best friend through thick and thin. 6 months later got pregnant.
My point is, the Lord has always been watching out for us. Through the thick and the thin, my little family has been taken care of, grown in so many ways.
I have thought that 4 kids would be fun, but I came to the conclusion that we were only going to have three. And, we were fine with that. I could hold babies without getting baby hungry and I was ok with where our life was going and excited for it. It was more affordable...... But plans change. My mother in law passed awayin october and with that came some amazing experiences that I can't write on here, but one thing I can write is how I saw her live her life. She loved one thing in life more than anything, she lived around this, she served around this, and was happy around this. It was her family. It got me thinking, that when I am 65 what really do I want that will make me happy? yes teaching school will be nice, being an emptynester for maybe a week will be nice, but then what after that week?! I want to be with my family. Extended family and inmediate family. I want to be around my grandbabies and my kids. Well, a lot of experiences happened fast that made me realize I knew there was another baby. But trying to convience my husband of this was going to be the test. Let's just say, you don't mess with God's plans when he answers your questions to your choices. Trent came on board, but little did we know the baby was already on board first :) Yes I am pregnant and due in August. I was thinking maybe it would happen in five months like faith. . I am surprised how everything fell together so fast, it makes me sad to wonder why I got pregnant so fast and I have friends and family members who can't. I don't know why we go through the trials we go through, but I think the key is showing compassion to others during their trials, and I will try to be very sensitive to those who are so deserving of kids and can't have them. I know I am just blabbing on right now but this is my journal and it's funny I have looked back on this blog to see at what point I was feeling what, when I was pregnant 4 years ago with Faith. YES FOUR YEARS AGO! It took me a while to get pregnant with her, so I was surprised that I didn't even blink with this one. I am not feeling as sick as I did with her, *praise the Lord* and I hope it only lasts the end of the first trimester. I wasn't going to tell anyone until I found out what I was having, but we ended up telling the kids and they of course told the primary class :) Plus I always look like death for 3 months so it's only obvious later down the road. I am scared this time around, I never was before. I am scared about the whole nursing situation due to my surgery and that I won't provide enough. I am scared that I gave EVERYTHING away and this time will be just the basics! I'm just scared of having a 4th, for judgments and all. But for awhile now I keep feeling there is a kid for me. I would say boy, but will find out. I am excited to raise one more. I really have been blessed with deep down good to heart kids. Some of the things I have craved : cottage cheese & cucumbers. At this point I have food aversions which are the worst . Today was a pretty good day and I can handle it if it's like this the rest of the month and when I hit 2nd trimester I hope it's like my first two!

Christmas came and went so fast. The Friday before Christmas, I helped my sister in laws decorate for my niece's birthday. We did a "Winter ONEderland" Party. It turned out really cute, and was fun decorating and helping dip chocolates. I made this tutu and highchair tutu for her. The party was fun to see Trent's family.
Normally I wait until Jan to put down the Christmas but this year I took it down the day after! We celebrated Christmas Eve at my Opa's like every Christmas. We came home and had our own little morning Christmas. The kids let us sleep in until around 7 :30 and then we went back to bed afterwards. That would've never happened in my house growing up. I remember we would wake up at around four and my parents told us we had to wait until at least six. So my siblings (those who were awake) and I would watch tv. Flintstone Christmas, The christmas Story were some of the things on tv, every christmas day. After we had our family christmas, we went up to my mom and dad's for dinner. On Thursday we had our Turner New year party at Kelli's. We had a white elephant party and it was perfect timing. I got rid of some old tapes that my mother in law had called "It's worth the wait" or "Strengthening your marriage" (With a picture of a couple from the 70's on a bike.) it was pretty funny. I also had a "Barney Goes to School" with a little craft I made that I didn't have room for. My sister ERin got the barney movie, and it was pretty funny. Then on Friday my little family headed to St.George to visit Trent's Dad. It still is weird going there without my dear MIL, but there are pictures of her up to remind us. He found a song called "My first christmas without you" that made me want to bawl, listening to him listen to it. FOr New years Eve we grabbed some Panda Express, opened some glow sticks (that we got from the white elephant party) and had some confetti. We all went to bed around 8! On Monday we came back home to get ready for school the next day. It was nice to come home with Christmas already put away! I am sure this year will go just as fast as last :)

2001-2011

Ever year, my Mother in Law wanted a letter tghat explained all that happened in our lives followed with pi cures, so she could put it in a scrapbook. I am in St. George this week, and decided to take the journal entry's that I made and put them all on here so when I get home, I can put them in my scrapbook too.

2001
Trent and Jamie met at Dixie College in St. George, Utah at the Bloomington Caves. Trent hung out with one of Jamie's friend's Terrence Stevens, and through him the two met. A week later the two were inseparable. They had lots of fun going to school dances, bonfires, other school activities, hanging out with the roommates, and most of all being together. Trent worked for Morgan Pest Control. Jamie wored for Dixie Kid's Daycare. Trent came up to Jamie's for Thanksgiving. In dec 2001 after Jamie's bishop interview, that night Trent took Jamie up to the Red Rocks to over loo St. George and the temple there. There he asked Jamie to be his Eternal Companion. Christmas was spent at the Turner's house that year. New Years was spent with the Coes. (The engagement spot is now being turned into a highway :(. That New Years Eve we danced in the center of the street while veryone was around us holding hands... perfect time to get engaged if we weren't already:))

2002
In Jan. Jamie moved home to plan the wedding.. Two months being apart long distance was very hard. Jamie went to St. George during Valentines day to visit. When Jamie had her bridal shower she got to see Trent again, it reminder her of how she will see him in heaven. He looked so much better and taller than she remembered (And he was already good looking in my head) and was so excited to soon be his wife. On March 1st Jamie had her endowments aken out in the Bountiful temple. A week later, on March 8, 2002 Trent and Jamie were married for Time and All Eternity in the SLC Temple. (We took the song from Michael McClean "We can be together forever someday" And switched it out to "We can be together forever March 8th") The Olympics had just gotten over so there were still posters up all over SLC. They were married at 1:00 and had a reception at Ivy Lanes Reception Center in Ogden. They honeymooned in BearLake. They lived in St. George for 8 months while they both worked and went to school. In Sept they were excited to find out they were expecting a baby!!! In Nov. they moved up to Layton in an apartment.

2003
In May Trent and Jame welcomed a beautiful 6 pound 13 ounce baby girl. They named her Hannah, after one of Jamie's ancestors who came across the plains. Hannah was just a petite little thing, but gave much joy to many. Trent worked for R.C. Willey's and Jamie was able to stay home with Hannah. In the winter of 2003, they moved into a rental house in Washington Tr. Utah

2004
Hannah loved playing with her cousin Brinley, and going to Grandma's house often. Hannah loved to sing, dance, and play outside on the swing. Hannah had Nana come stay a week while Jamie went on a trip with her sister. Trent was doing the same thing for R.C Willey's but for a new company. June of this year, Trent and Jamie were excited to announce they were expecting once again!

2005
On Jan 28th Jamie went into preterm labor and had a beautiful 6 pound 5 ounce baby boy named Austin Kenneth coe. Kenneth was his grandpa's middle name. Nana and Papa were on a mission this time, so the family was excited to show them Austin, when they returned. Austin and Hannah kept Jamie on her toes and enjoyed every bit of motherhood. In dec. Trent and Jamie moved to an apartment in ogden. Trent decided to go to school for his journeyman in plumbing.

2006
Jamie enjoyed the apartment they had in ogden. There was a swimming pool so they all went swimming a lot! They only had one car, so Jamie would get up early to drop Trent off at work. The kids got used to being good in the car, so when they made trips to St. George, their kids were good! Once again Jami eand Trent served in the sunbeams at church. Jamie and Trent always served together as either nursery leaders or sunbeam teachers. In Dec Trent was offered a job in Utah County at Northwind Plumbing. They moved into an apartment in Orem.

2007
In March Jamie and Trent bought a house in EM. Jamie started teaching her own preschool in the home. She had 13 students that first year. Hannah was put into dance and they loved their neighborhood. Trent enjoyed working for northwind. In Nov Jamie and Trent were excited to be expecting their third child.

2008
After a long hard pregnancy, they welcomed a beautiful 7 pound 5 ounce chubby cheeked baby girl named Faith Sienna Coe to the family on 08/08/08. They named her Sienna after Trent's great great grandma. After Faith was born, Jamie and Trent started to meet some great friends, the wilkerson's had one son who was 8 and lyndee culdn't have any more. Lyndee (the mom) had a hard time with this. Jamie was outside and made Lyndee hold faith After that, lyndee and faith became great friends. Lyndee claimed that "faith" made her faith in the Lord strong and that things would work out in due time. The other family was the RObinsons. Everweekened they stayed up until 4 AM playing games with everyone. Jamie continued to teach preschool and Hannah started kindergarten.

2009
Hannah started first grade, Austin is preparing for kindergarten and loves to make his sisters laugh. Faith learned how to walk and we celebrated her 1st Birthday. On her first birthday, her little Buddy lyndee also found out she was finally expecting a baby! Faith continues to melt people's hearts. Hannah is doing great at reading, and austin loves to make everyone around him laugh. Trent's company merged into a new one called Pacific North. They are thankful for the job that he has in this hard economy. Together they are on the activities committee, nursery leaders, and Jamie is also on enrichment. The Lord continues to bless them all in many ways. They couldn't ask for anything more than a healthy family, great friends, and a great job.

(THis is all I have done so far, the funny ironic thing is the last thing I said because within two years all that would change.)

To Martha- I am here in your home, MISSING you SO much. I wish I had be more eager in finishing this scrapbook. However, here is the last 2 years:

2010
This year was probably one of the hardest years for our family. I won't go into details, but all I like to say is through the clouds you find a rainbow, and through our trials we have been poured out in blessings. There are many dear friends that I met this year because we all went through similar experiences throughout life. They really are angels among us. Hannah started 2nd grade and Austin started kindergarten! I stopped doing preschool and started doing school online. Trent's job took him to Montana, so I got to play "single Mom". Martha came to the kid's reflection program, and they won. Trent got laid off of work the week of his birthday. We had already planned on going on a cruise, so we went. We went to the Bahama's while Martha stayed with the kids. I loved Coco Cay. The water was wonderful and the island was beautiful! We added a new member to our family this year.. a yorkie puppy named Charlie.

2011
This year Hannah started 3rd grade, and Jamie was able to be her room mom. Austin started 1st grade. Jame will do his parties next year. Jamie started babysitting for her neighbor twice a week. Jamie started her own, party business and has fun doing that on the side for fun. Trent and Jamie received so many wonderful blessings this year, a lot of them were in disguise. This year had it's share of bumps too, but the gospel poured through in amazing ways. Jamie was called as librarian and then into Youn WOmens. She loved teaching those girls that they were worth it. She was able to do girls camp this summer. Trent helped his brother in law out that summer. Faith likes to tag a long with her sister and brother, and they are amazingly good to her. She comes up to Jamie ad says "I need you!" The kids love to watch netflix and enjoy family home evening. Austin is doing amazing in Reading. In Oct, we suddenly unexpectedly lost Trent's mom Martha (Who this book was for) It was a great loss, but her sweet memory lingers on. In Nov we all went to Trent's dad's house for Thanksgiving. Christmas came and went fast and we celebrated it with the Turners. Here I am now celebrating New Years at Trent's Dad's house. This year has been the year of miracles. Even though on the outside looking in you would ask why?! With death, loss,no job, and other things.... you would wonder what I was thinking. It is something I can honestly say that while I don't wish those trials on anyone, the testimony and sweet tender mercies of the Lord are very prominate during and after the storm. I am grateful for my gifts that the Lord has given me, for the trials to go through, for the blessings, for the people we love, and for every opportunity to say " Wow, the Lord really does love me!"

2012- A year of Great Changes. Let's hope to get healthy, educated, & spend quality time with people we love. Let's watch the mircales pour out and be anchord in the Lord through the calm and the storm. This year is Trent and Jamie's 10th Anniversary! Hannah turns 9, Austin turns 7, and Faith turns 4!!! Crazy that my kids are so old, and that is already 2012! THey year the Myans said was the last!! SO while it's crazy, there should be loads of fun is on the way once again this y

I was in charge of hannah's school party, so I did the theme "The Grinch meets the polar express" I made up a poem based on the orginal Grinch Poem, the kids sat in a "Train" of chairs and listened to my brother in laws voice on Cd has he read it. Then another group played "Pin the heart on the grinch" the other group of rotation tied blankets and collected hats for the less fortunate & cancer patients. I had a picture of the little poor boy on The Polar Express in this group. We had a hot chocloate bar, frosted cookies, and played pass the bucket around to the "polar express " Soundtrack and when it stopped you got to keep a present. All in all, I think the kids had fun!

Here is the poem if anyone wants to use it:


The Grinch Meets the Polar Express
Every Who Down in Whoville Liked helping The Polar Express a lot…
But the Grinch, Who lived just north of Whoville, Did NOT!
The Grinch hated Beleiving in helping others for the whole Christmas season!
Now, please don’t ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
It could be his head wasn’t screwed on just right.
It could be, perhaps, that his shoes were too tight.
But I think that the most likely reason of all,
May have been that his heart was two sizes too small.
Whatever the reason, His heart or his shoes,
He stood there on Christmas Eve, hating the Whos,
Staring down from his cave with a sour, Grinchy frown,
At the warm lighted Train below, coming into town.
For he knew every Who down in Whoville below,
Was busy now, waiting for the train whistle to blow.
“And they’re Helping others!” he snarled with a sneer,
“Tomorrow is Christmas! It’s practically here!”
Then he growled, with his Grinch fingers nervously drumming,
“I MUST find some way to stop The Polar Express from coming!”
For Tomorrow, he knew, all the Who children that believe in helping others,
would bring smiles to all they helped , from Parents, to Sisters & Brothers!
And then! O’ The noise of the train steaming around
going in circles round and round.
That’s one thing he hated! The NOISE!
NOISE! NOISE! NOISE!
Then the Whos would get their hot chocolate ready to drink.
And they’d ring their bells close to hear them tink!
And the more the Grinch thought of this whole helping out,
He wanted to pull his hair out and Shout!
“Why, for Many years I’ve put up with it now!”
“I MUST stop this Helping Train from coming! But HOW?”
Then he got an idea! An awful idea!
THE GRINCH GOT A WONDERFUL, AWFUL IDEA!
“I know just what to do!” The Grinch laughed in his throat.
And he made a quick conductor hat and a coat.
And he chuckled, and clucked, “What a great Grinchy trick!”
“Now, I just need a ticket punch that can entered town.
Whos were all waiting, he thought with a frown.
He hopped onto to the train as the breaks hissed,
And he opened the doors with his hole punch in his fist.

“ALL ABOARD” he said for a moment or two.
Then he stuck his tongue out as the children came through.
He saw the children holding giving blankets & hats in a row.
“These Blankets & hats,” he grinned, “are the first things to go!”
Then he slithered and slunk, with a smile most unpleasant,
He sat the children on the train as they handed him their giving presents!
He grabbed the hats that were to help others feel happy
And as he took the warm blankets, He thought “O This is so sappy!”
And he stuffed them in bags in the back of the caboose,
“And NOW, I will hide them back at my home” He said with a boost!
And the Grinch grabbed the bags, and he started to shove,
When he heard a small sound like the coo of a dove.
He turned around fast, and he saw a small Who!
A Little Who Boy, that was older than two.
The Grinch had been caught by this tiny Who Child,
So he preteneded to be the conductor and smiled.
The boy stared at the Grinch and said, “O conductor, why,”
“Why are you taking our Helping Bags? WHY?”
But, you know, that old Grinch was so smart and so slick,
He thought up a lie, and he thought it up quick!
“Why, my sweet little tot,” the fake conductor lied,
“I found some blankets that weren’t done being tied.”
“So I’m taking the bags to the back of the train my dear.”
“I’ll fix the blankets down there. Then I’ll bring it back here.”
And his fib fooled the child. Then he patted his head,
He got him a drink & told him to sit in the seat that was red.
And when the boy went to the seat holding his cup,
The Grinch grabbed the bag and lifted it up!
Then the last thing he took was all the hot chocolate!
Then he jumped off the train as fast as a rocket.
He ran Up the side of Mt. Crumpit,
He carried the load to the tiptop to dump it!
“PoohWooh to the Whos!” he was grinchishly humming.
“They’re finding out now that no helping others is coming!”
“They’re just Figuring it out, their mouths will hang open a minute or two,
Then the Whos down in Whoville will all cry BooHoo!”
“That’s a noise,” grinned the Grinch, “That I simply MUST hear!”
So he paused. And the Grinch put his hand to his ear.
And he did hear a sound rising over the snow.
It started in low. Then it started to grow.
But the sound wasn’t sad! Why, this sound sounded merry!
It couldn’t be so! But it WAS merry! VERY!
He stared down at Whoville! The Grinch popped his eyes!
Then he shook! What he saw was a shocking surprise!
Every Who down in Whoville, the tall and the small,
Were ringing their believing bells! Without any presents at all!
He HADN’T stopped Beleiving in helping others from coming! IT CAME!
Somehow or other, it came just the same!
And the Grinch, with his grinch-feet ice-cold in the snow,
Stood puzzling and puzzling: “How could it be so?”
“It came with out ribbons! It came without tags!”
“It came without packages, boxes or bags!”
And he puzzled three hours, till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before!
“Maybe Christmas,” he thought, “doesn’t come from a store.”
“Maybe Christmas…perhaps…means a little bit more!”
And what happened then? Well…in Whoville they say,
That the Grinch’s small heart Grew three sizes that day!
And the minute his heart didn’t feel quite so tight,
He whizzed with his load through the bright morning light,
And he brought back the Helping blankets and hats!
He said he was sorry & started to help real fast
So now you see, we have a lot to do
So let’s start believing in helping other whos
For Some go without and some are freezing cold
And others just need loving hands to just hold
So here is a bell to ring when the time is just right
To remember all those you can give a helping hand in tonight
...

For thanksgiving, we went down to St. George to stay with Trent's Dad. We went a little bit earlier than the rest of the family. It was good to talk to bill, and have family down there. It's amazing how much family can help the mourning process and bring strength and warmth. I love ALL of his brothers and sisters & their spouses. I know at times I have been shy or flat off the deep end... but deep down I am SO grateful that I married into the Coe's. I will spare all the details, but needless to say it was still comforting to feel Martha's love and memory all around. I know without a doubt she is watching over us and my testimony of the gospel has expanded with it. I decided to play with my kids like Martha did, and all I can say is that woman had a lot of patience~! I tried keeping the kids busy with little pictures to color and making cookies & a try at pie. My lovely sister in law took these pictures at Thanksgiving dinner. Thank you!

For Christmas Party at the Coes, we met at Kim's house and exchanged kid gifts. Then the siblings handed out little handouts they made if they had any. (I love the simplicity of it) This year we went to temple square to hand out notes that said something along the lines of " Just to let you know someone is thinking of you today" We got the service idea out of the book that has become a help to us, and something that martha read before she passed, "The Message" Austin gave some out, including to a skater kid standing by himself. I think this one touched me the most. While we walked away he just stood there looking at the note. Then Austin gave one to a bunch of teenage girls who thought it was the cutest thing ever. Then he gave one to an old man with a funny hat, and he chuckled as did his wife. Hannah gave one to a "grandma" . I loved the idea and hope to continue the tradition.

Halloween

Halloween this year came fast. I think my life stopped off october 14th and I just have gone through the motions. I feel like October 15th hasn't come yet, because that was when coe's where coming home and then we were going to have a family halloween party and so on.... But plans changed and getting used to that is hard. HAlloween came and went, and that night I broke down. I kept thinking "Just be excited for Halloween.. it's coming soon" and then it came and went. I was ready for it to be over. I am clinging to christmas music this year *which is funny because normally I want it AFTER thanksgiving." My kids dressed up as Jessie from Toy Story, Tangled, and MArio. We had a Halloween party but I think I am burned out with throwing my own friend parties. Next year though Lyndee & mom , Cindy said I can bring whoever I want to her Pump House. We will do that instead I am hannah's room mom so we had rotations of " Cake WAlk" with the Monster Mash music, make a skeleton out of q tips, pin the teeth on dracula, pumpkin bowling, Trick Or Treat Game, candy corn toss, owl making cookies, and then we finished it off with donuts and rootbeer. They got "Witches Wands" that were pencils to take home. It was fun, If we are going to have a party... It better be one were we go all the way!! That night I took the kids and my nephew Mason Trick or Treating. Gina and her family were all sick!! Bummer.

I guess I better write all this down before I forget. That and I don't like coming on my blog and seeing the pictures on there. My mother in law was the nicest person I have ever met. Not a soul disliked her. Everyone from all walks of life loved and cherished Martha. She was a second mother to me and the best mother in law a girl could ask for. I call my mom many times a day, and Martha was no exception. I called her at least once a day while she was off her mission and as much as I could when she was on. I loved chatting with her, she had a peaceful way of just listening. I loved that she would ask for my advice on occasions. She worried constantly about her grandchildren and children and wanted what was best for them. On Friday October 14th I had called her to see if she wanted to come over. Bill and Martha had just finished their mission and were helping my sister in law paint her new house. She just moved in the next neighborhood from me. I would call Martha and ask her "When are you going home?" "Are you excited?" and she would say " I am SO excited" "It may be sooner, but for sure I am coming home October 15th. That is the last day." so on Friday October 14th I asked her at 10:30 in the morning "Hey why don't you and the kids *gina's kids* come over so you don't feel like you are in the way of painting?" She said that she wanted to and they were getting a late start as is. The night before she stopped for a second to drop off Austin who went with her to Kim(other sister in laws) house. She came in for about two minutes and I tried to get her to stay longer but she had to put kids to bed. I remember hannah bringing her in and showing her the new bunk beds, and Faith was so excited "NANA!!" .... Trent and Igave her a hug and she asked if she could see us for FHE on monday. We were going to be gone so I asked if we could on sunday instead. If I had known that was my last hug, I would've held on tighter and longer. Fast forward to 12:30 Friday. Trent said he wanted to take me out.. my friend Lyndee watched Faith and I told him to call his mom first. He said he doubted she was coming because there was a lot to be done. I ended up calling her and she said a lot was having to be done, so I told her I would see her sunday. She was about to go lay the baby down for a nap. I turn my phone down so I never hear it.. I get too many calls from other places that don't stop calling so I have learned to live with it off. After we ate I got out my phone and noticed I missed calls and texts from Gina. It said that mom was unconscious. I called Gina, and she told me that martha had passed out and they thought it was paint fumes, but soon realized that it was more serious. She had a brain aneurysm rupture. We ran and got on the motorcycle and I kept thinking "How could this be? I just talked to her an hour or two ago!" I was trying to pray on the way in my head that all would be ok, but the words wouldn't come. I prayed that she would last until all her kids could see her. I called my brother once I got to the hospital, he is an intern at a hospital in Indiana. I told him what I knew and he told me in return that "I hate to be the barrer of bad news, but it sounds bleak Jamie." He was on his way to the E.R for his little girl who was having a difficult time breathing. About an hour later the nurse came out and told us all "It looked bleak." To make a long story short Martha passed away on October 15th at 3:00 a.m My eyes burned from the wind on the bike and crying so hard. I was amazed at the love people showed me, many who I least expected. I know now what to do when someone I love has someone die, it is SO helpful to have dinners brought in, it is so wonderful to have flowers at the service from someone thinking of you, it is thoughtful for people to show up at the viewing and the funeral, and to think of you after the fact.. for that is when the hard time will hit. That sunday I got up to bare my testimony, that I have had special feelings of acceptance of this. The holidays will be hard. Many wonderful experiences of being with family that week planning the funeral, helping dress her, making the video,is a tender mercy that the Lord has for us that first week. The funeral was wonderful, and now we live in her memory. Here are some journal entry's I filled out... but mostly I find this something that I like to keep to myself, the feelings, the experiences.. they are things that are not easy to explain.

I feel like I am in a dream and when reality hits, I want to wake up. I see pictures of her, I can't wait for thanksgiving to be with her, and I want to call her... and then I remember she isn't here. My world just will never be the same. In her death, I hope to learn how to live, by living by her example. At the funeral austin said to me "Mom , why are you crying? She is watching over us. YOU KNOW THAT. It isn't sad. We will see her again" We were putting the granchildren's colored pictures in the casket. I told him, " I know , but it's still sad." What a spiritual giant, He was listening and he was a comfort to me.

Oct 31:
I hate going about my day, and then sitting and getting the thought that she is gone. If I dwell on it, i feel like I've been punched in the gut and I won't see her in this life again, is overwhelming. I know spiritually she is where she needs to be, the viel is thin and I KNOW without a DOUBT she is good. However, the natural man of me is wanting her back, I miss her phone calls, everything, Tonight on Halloween... reality is hitting once more. i want to curl up in a ball and just weep.
Nov 9th- Faith asked me "Is Nana awake?"

Most times I feel her near, and can imagine what she is thinking.. or her smiling.. listening to her talk. I know without a doubt she is watching over us more now than ever. They were reading a book called "The Message" before she passed, it's what got them talking about "if they die" and I am normally weary of near death experiences from people, but I read this, and many things I believe strongly were in this book. I felt comfort and believe it to be true. Until I see you again Martha, I miss and love you more than I would say you would ever know... however, I am sure you know it.

This post doesn't do justice of how she was, always smiling, cheerful, ready to help... she helped me wash my hair and rub my back after my surgery, she would listen to me, love my children. love me as if I was her own. I always tell people if they needed a place to stay, she would've taken them in and been an exellent host. She became an instant friend to all. She always invited me over for dinner when I was dating Trent.. I loved that. I loved visiting with her and talking to her. There were some fun times, funny times and memoriable times. I am glad she was able to speak at Hannah's baptism just this last June on comfort and the Holy Ghost. I think the only thing that was wrong... is there wasn't enough of her to go around.. so many people loved her and wanted to see her. I can't continue writing this because it just is hard... but I am thankful to know I am not alone and that she is "Watching over me from up above."

Because I have been given much....

I haven't really been in the mood to talk about this, but my dear, wonderful, compassionate, most christlike, beautiful mother in law passed away unexpectedly from brain aneurysm. I had just talked to her on the phone ten minutes before it happened. When I finally turned my phone back on I had missed calls from my sister in law. My mother in law had just finished up her fifth mission and was ready to go to st.george in a couple days. I kept asking her " WHen will you be done with your mission?" She said "October 15th. or sooner I hope." She was officially done with her life mission on October 15th at 3:09 in the morning. It was a very sad, yet now looking back, spirtual moment. She was 64 years old, and healthy as could be. It is very surreal and my heart hurts, yet at the same time I know her too well to know that she is loved in this life and the next and that I will get to see and hold her once again. I love you MARTHA. You were THE BEST mother in law a girl could ever ask for. I am so blessed to be called your daughter in law, and when I first got engaged I wondered where that sparkly little cinderella ring I wanted was, but I tell you what, I am so blessed to have my wedding ring be one of your rings. I will pass it down when I am on my death bed to my girls. No sparkly cinderella ring could ever have so much meaning to my life. I took a picture on my phone but I believe it is too personal and spiritual for it to be shown on here. However, my awesome sister in law Sheryl took pictures that were just perfect and they speak for themselves. Hope she doesn't mind me using them.

I decided to have a "Fall Bucket List" for the month of October. Here are some of the things I put down:

Get lost in a corn maze... check (At least Faith and I did with my parents.. the other two were having fun with their cousins.)
GO to a pumpkin patch... check
make halloween costumes... check (Jessie & Tangeled I made them up... no sew of course.)
watch kid scary movie... check
make sugar cookies... check
take fall photos
play in the leafs
go for a ride / picnic in the canyon
paint/carve pumpkins
tell ghost stories
Have a halloween party
Play ghost in the graveyard
Sing halloween songs







I am going to do this for Nov. and Dec. as well!!