you ever heard the quote " life happens when you make other plans?" That has been my life, and you know what? I wouldn't change a thing.
First started when I went to Dixie, my plans :
Go to school & get teaching degree. Go on a mission.
Reality:
Went to school. Got married to a man who became my best friend through thick and thin. 6 months later got pregnant.
My point is, the Lord has always been watching out for us. Through the thick and the thin, my little family has been taken care of, grown in so many ways.
I have thought that 4 kids would be fun, but I came to the conclusion that we were only going to have three. And, we were fine with that. I could hold babies without getting baby hungry and I was ok with where our life was going and excited for it. It was more affordable...... But plans change. My mother in law passed awayin october and with that came some amazing experiences that I can't write on here, but one thing I can write is how I saw her live her life. She loved one thing in life more than anything, she lived around this, she served around this, and was happy around this. It was her family. It got me thinking, that when I am 65 what really do I want that will make me happy? yes teaching school will be nice, being an emptynester for maybe a week will be nice, but then what after that week?! I want to be with my family. Extended family and inmediate family. I want to be around my grandbabies and my kids. Well, a lot of experiences happened fast that made me realize I knew there was another baby. But trying to convience my husband of this was going to be the test. Let's just say, you don't mess with God's plans when he answers your questions to your choices. Trent came on board, but little did we know the baby was already on board first :) Yes I am pregnant and due in August. I was thinking maybe it would happen in five months like faith. . I am surprised how everything fell together so fast, it makes me sad to wonder why I got pregnant so fast and I have friends and family members who can't. I don't know why we go through the trials we go through, but I think the key is showing compassion to others during their trials, and I will try to be very sensitive to those who are so deserving of kids and can't have them. I know I am just blabbing on right now but this is my journal and it's funny I have looked back on this blog to see at what point I was feeling what, when I was pregnant 4 years ago with Faith. YES FOUR YEARS AGO! It took me a while to get pregnant with her, so I was surprised that I didn't even blink with this one. I am not feeling as sick as I did with her, *praise the Lord* and I hope it only lasts the end of the first trimester. I wasn't going to tell anyone until I found out what I was having, but we ended up telling the kids and they of course told the primary class :) Plus I always look like death for 3 months so it's only obvious later down the road. I am scared this time around, I never was before. I am scared about the whole nursing situation due to my surgery and that I won't provide enough. I am scared that I gave EVERYTHING away and this time will be just the basics! I'm just scared of having a 4th, for judgments and all. But for awhile now I keep feeling there is a kid for me. I would say boy, but will find out. I am excited to raise one more. I really have been blessed with deep down good to heart kids. Some of the things I have craved : cottage cheese & cucumbers. At this point I have food aversions which are the worst . Today was a pretty good day and I can handle it if it's like this the rest of the month and when I hit 2nd trimester I hope it's like my first two!